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Sending Messages to the Spirit World

7/2/2014

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When Maddy's husband Carlos died this spring, her chief concern was for their children. Nine and six years old, both on the autism spectrum, they loved their daddy fiercely, just as he loved them. Maddy knew that a regular funeral or memorial service would hold little meaning for them.

"I wanted to have them write messages to their Dad and put them in helium balloons to send to him in heaven," she told me. "But their grandma vetoed the idea - she said it's bad for the birds."

I suggested Bright Eyes Dove Release instead. Maddy love the idea and when I contacted Jadia Ward of Bright Eyes, so did she. Jade and her husband Mike founded their Vancouver, WA-based dove release business in 2011 after what she describes as a "serendipitous chain of events." Jade was particularly touched by the story of these grieving children. As she says, "The rising of a released dove is an excellent way to assist children with the concept of the continuation of the spirit, and to help them visualize continued life."

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We gathered on a rain-soaked Monday after Father's Day at the park where the kids and their two best friends had spent so many good times with Carlos. The children had come prepared with messages to their father they had written, per Jade's instructions, on slips of paper the size of a fortune cookie message. After they spent some time getting to know the doves (they had lots and lots of questions for the very patient dove wranglers) they read their messages out loud. Then they watched as Jade and Mike affixed the messages to the dove's ankles. 

They continued to be entranced as Jade and Mike transferred the doves from their traveling coop to the release baskets. Finally, it was time to fly!

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Jade invited the children to oversee the opening of the basket lids so they could be personally involved in the release. One bird seemed reluctant to take flight. No surprise, it was the one designated as Carlos's spirit dove. As much as it seemed to enjoy hanging out in the basket under the children's gaze, it finally felt the pull of the rest of the flock and flew skyward.

We all watched as the flock appeared above the trees, headed home with their messages. Once we were ready to begin packing up, Jade called the children back over, with a tone of wonder in her voice. "Look kids! Look what the doves have left for you!" Four perfect white feathers, one each for Carlos's two children and their two best friends.

In the coming weeks or months, Maddy will take Jade up on her offer and travel with the kids to the Vancouver roost to pay the doves a visit, and perhaps reflect further on the day their messages were delivered to their Dad in the spirit world.

With great appreciation to Bright Eyes Dove Release for their generous support of Maddy and her children. I highly recommend this special couple and their uplifting doves for any ceremonial occasion.
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  • Holly Pruett Celebrant LLC – Creative Life Ceremonies from Cradle to Grave
  • Certified Life-Cycle Celebrant ® | Funeral & Wedding Officiant | Interfaith Minister
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